Snoring might not be seen as a major source of conflict in marriage, but modern research shows there can be serious medical causes of snoring and many detrimental effects on the bedmate of a snorer. Snoring should not be ignored when it is causing problems in a marriage, especially since there are many non-invasive options to prevent snoring.
How Snoring Hurts a Spouse
Although many snoring cures focus on the person who is snoring, there is another person to consider. For the spouse who is trying to sleep, snoring can be a severe problem with daytime repercussions. According to SnoringBeGone.com, those who sleep with a snoring spouse can lose one hour of sleep per evening. Those who suffer from sleep arousal syndrome can wake 21 times per hour and experience daytime fatigue, irritability, poor work performance, difficulty concentrating, restlessness and feeling ill. In addition to snoring, spouses can suffer from partners who kick, jerk and move in their sleep.
“This is not a mild problem. The lack of sleep for both partners puts a strain on the marriage and creates a hostile and tense situation," said Rosalind Cartwright, PhD, founder of the Sleep Disorders Center at Rush University Medical Center in “Can Snoring Ruin a Marriage?” by Kim Waterman. “This is a frequent problem within marriages that nobody is paying enough attention to."
Options to help suffering spouses cope with snoring include sleeping in separate bedrooms, using ear plugs or going to bed before the snorer. These methods may help while the snorer is seeking a solution to stop snoring.
Help Snoring Sufferers
Snoring can be mild and simply an aggravation, or it can be severe and a sign of a medical problem like sleep apnea. When snoring is mild or occasional, there are some methods to try before seeing a doctor, according to the National Sleep Foundation. Being overweight is one of the most common risk factors for snoring, so losing weight or increasing activity can help reduce snoring. Avoiding alcohol, antihistamines and heavy meals three hours before bedtime can help snoring. Giving up cigarettes and sleeping pills can also prevent snoring.
Some snoring sufferers only snore when they are sleeping on their backs. Instead of hitting a snoring spouse and telling him or her to roll over, there are other methods of preventing a snorer from sleeping on the back. A snoring device known as a snore ball can prevent people from sleeping on their back.
Another way to help snoring sufferers sleep on their side is to place a tennis ball in a sock and pin it to the back of the pajamas between the shoulder blades. Rolling onto the back will be uncomfortable and train the snorer to roll onto his or her side.
There are other ways to help snoring as well. Using a nasal strip can help to open the airway and improve nasal breathing. Decongestant nasal sprays or saline spray can also open the airway to reduce snoring. Using internal nasal dilators may also help.
When to See a Doctor for Snoring
Although there are many home remedies to try to help snoring, there are certain situations when seeing a doctor is the best option. The National Sleep Foundation recommends seeing a doctor when snorers are suffering from excessive daytime sleepiness, morning headaches, recent weight gain, not feeling rested in the morning, feeling confused when awakening at night, observing pauses in breathing while asleep or a change in the ability to concentrate. Snorers should also consult a doctor if they are snoring every night or disturbing the sleep of their partners, the NSF says. Other experts recommend seeing a doctor if snoring has recently started.
There are several different ways that doctors can help snoring sufferers. After an exam, the doctor may decide to perform a sleep study to see if sleep apnea is present. Depending on the results, the doctor may recommend lifestyle changes, surgery, dental appliances or treatment for sleep apnea.
Sleep Apnea and the CPAP Machine
When a snorer is diagnosed with sleep apnea, more invasive medical intervention may be required. Sleep apnea occurs when the walls of the throat close completely and there is a cessation of breathing, according to the NSF. This serious medical condition requires attention, which can include continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP), losing weight, sleeping on the side, and avoiding alcohol and tobacco. The CPAP machine works by blowing room air into the back of the throat to prevent its collapse.
If the noise of the CPAP machine bothers a spouse, there are ways to make it less intrusive. Dr. Suzan Jaffe recommends calling the medical supply company to get a longer cord for the machine in her NSF article, “Ask the Sleep Expert: Partners and Sleep Problems." Jaffe says a longer cord will allow couples to place the CPAP machine in the closet or further away from the bed. Jaffe also recommends using earplugs or going to sleep before the partner turns on the machine.
Married couples do not need to suffer from snoring or sleep arousal syndrome when there are many successful treatments to stop snoring. Lifestyle changes are the easiest way to help snoring but medical intervention may be required. With a little bit of time and work, couples can find snoring cures that work for them. Couples who are considering whether to move to separate beds to deal with snoring may want to read Should Spouses Sleep Separately?
Genna Cockerham - Genna Cockerham has been writing online since November 2008. She served as Marriage Feature Writer from December 2008 to February ...
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